Best Funny Relationship Jokes

Funny short relationship jokes that pokes fun at relationships and marriage. Also includes numerous jokes about women and men.

Five Signs

in Relationship Jokes
+30 -55

Five signs that a women is angry with you.

1. She’s silent.
2. She’s yelling.
3. She acts the same.
4. She acts different.
5. She murdered you.

Candlelit Dinner

in Relationship Jokes
+18 -44

Me and my wife had a candlelit dinner for the first time last night. It was terrible, everything was really under-cooked and tasted of wax.

Eyes Open

in Relationship Jokes
+16 -42

Don’t you just hate it when you kiss a girl and her eyes are open. It usually means you have about 5 minutes before she regains consciousness.

Bag and Belt

in Relationship Jokes
+14 -40

My wife wanted a bag and a belt for her birthday so I got her a vacuum cleaner.

Being Single

in Relationship Jokes
+19 -45

Fed up of being single? Fed up of dating websites? I’ve now developed the perfect strategy that is guaranteed success. Just lower your standards. My new girlfriend is actually a coconut sellotaped to a mop.