FunnyShortJokes.com http://www.funnyshortjokes.com Get your short jokes rated! Tue, 25 Jun 2019 00:24:14 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=5.2.2 Army http://www.funnyshortjokes.com/army Tue, 25 Jun 2019 00:24:13 +0000 http://www.funnyshortjokes.com/?p=13151 My granddad used to be in the army until he ate all the rations. He Read more

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My granddad used to be in the army until he ate all the rations.
He was shot for desserting.

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Alexa http://www.funnyshortjokes.com/alexa Tue, 25 Jun 2019 00:19:33 +0000 http://www.funnyshortjokes.com/?p=13142 For those worried about Alexa listening to your conversations Amazon are now releasing a male Read more

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For those worried about Alexa listening to your conversations Amazon are now releasing a male version called Alex who ignores everything you say.

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Fat Lass http://www.funnyshortjokes.com/fat-lass Fri, 21 Jun 2019 08:30:18 +0000 http://www.funnyshortjokes.com/?p=13120 I was talking to a fat lass with huge tits last night. “My eyes are Read more

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I was talking to a fat lass with huge tits last night.

“My eyes are up here…” I said, as she looked down at the kebab in my hand.

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Chernobyl http://www.funnyshortjokes.com/chernobyl-2 Fri, 21 Jun 2019 08:29:41 +0000 http://www.funnyshortjokes.com/?p=13130 Why do you have to use underwear in Ukrain? Cause chernobyl fall out.

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Why do you have to use underwear in Ukrain?

Cause chernobyl fall out.

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Gym http://www.funnyshortjokes.com/gym-3 Tue, 18 Jun 2019 05:36:05 +0000 http://www.funnyshortjokes.com/?p=13127 Went to the gym last night and lost 4 stones in one day. I accidentally Read more

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Went to the gym last night and lost 4 stones in one day.

I accidentally ripped my leg off on the squat machine.

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Crime Book http://www.funnyshortjokes.com/crime-book Tue, 18 Jun 2019 00:16:41 +0000 http://www.funnyshortjokes.com/?p=13116 Crimewatch have released their first book, it has the 50 most wanted criminals in Britain Read more

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Crimewatch have released their first book, it has the 50 most wanted criminals in Britain in it.

It’s called “50 shades of black”

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iPad http://www.funnyshortjokes.com/ipad-3 Fri, 14 Jun 2019 09:00:47 +0000 http://www.funnyshortjokes.com/?p=13117 I said to my girlfriend, “Please get me a newspaper.” “Don’t be silly,” she replied, Read more

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I said to my girlfriend, “Please get me a newspaper.”
“Don’t be silly,” she replied, “you can borrow my iPad.”

That spider never knew what f*cking hit it.

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Cyrus Pickup Line http://www.funnyshortjokes.com/cyrus-pickup-line Fri, 14 Jun 2019 00:03:59 +0000 http://www.funnyshortjokes.com/?p=13118 On a scale of Cyrus to Jewish, how tight are you?

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On a scale of Cyrus to Jewish, how tight are you?

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Apple Crumble http://www.funnyshortjokes.com/apple-crumble Tue, 11 Jun 2019 00:36:33 +0000 http://www.funnyshortjokes.com/?p=13115 Q. How do you make apple crumble? A. Release photos of children being beaten inside Read more

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Q. How do you make apple crumble?

A. Release photos of children being beaten inside Chinese iPhone factories.

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Bubble Wrap http://www.funnyshortjokes.com/bubble-wrap Tue, 11 Jun 2019 00:30:42 +0000 http://www.funnyshortjokes.com/?p=13119 “Where do you want this big roll of bubble wrap?” I asked my boss. “Just Read more

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“Where do you want this big roll of bubble wrap?” I asked my boss.
“Just pop it in the corner,” he said.

After 3 hours of popping I’ve now been fired :(!

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