Funny Short Jokes

Find the best quick hilariously funny jokes that are easy to remember.

Phobia

in Racist Jokes
+3 -14

Q. What do you call the phobia of black people?
A. Common sense

Sofa Bed DIY Tips

in Relationship Jokes
+6 -5

Convert your sofa into a sofa-bed by simply forgetting your wife’s birthday.

Egg Cooking Advice

in Surreal Jokes
+2 -8

Instead of wasting money on costly egg timers simply boil your egg to perfection by getting in your car and driving at 60 mph for exactly 3 miles. When you reach the 3 mile mark call your wife and tell her to take it out the pan.

Coffee

in General Jokes
+12 -4

Went to the doctors yesterday and told him that every time I drink coffee I get a stabbing pain in my right eye.

He advised me to take the spoon out of the cup.

Loosing Weight

in General Jokes
+6 -18

Found out recently that I have a condition which stops me from loosing weight. It’s called being a greedy c*nt.

Doctor’s office

in General Jokes
+10 -7

I went to my doctor and he said he had some good news and some bad news. He said the good news was that he got my test results and I had two days to live. Then he said the bad news was that he has been trying to contact me for two days.