Diet Day 1: Just removed all the fattening food from my house, it was delicious.
The following conversation took place between a 7 year old and his dad.
Boy: You know that thing between your legs?
Boy: Why do girls eat it?
Dad: How do you know about that?
Boy: I saw mommy eating uncle Jeff’s
You know you’re a bad driver when your SatNav says “In 400 yards, please stop the car and let me out”.
If you had the choice between being as rich as Bill Gates or having world peace, what color Lamborghini would you buy?
The following conversation took place between a husband and wife.
Wife: Give it to me i’m so f*ckin wet!
Husband: I don’t care how much you shout, I’m not giving you the umbrella.
In order to attract women I like to use this quote from Shakespeare’s Hamlet, Act III, Scene IV, line 82.