When you have a fat friend at school see-saws no longer exist, only catapults.
Four secrets of a happy marriage.
1. Find a woman who can cook and clean. 2. Find a woman who is an animal in bed. 3. Find a woman with lots of money. 4. Make sure none of these 3 women ever meet each-other.
When God created the world he made everyone different but he became tired when he got to the Chinese.
When I was a kid my dad used to beat me with his camera, I still have flash-backs.
Had an overdose on Viagra last night. My wife took it really hard.
Spoke to my family today after my WiFi went down. They seem like nice people.