Q. Why did the New Zealand farmer become a Muslim? A. Because he really loves ‘islamb.
Got some condoms earlier today from the self checkout machine at the supermarket and it said “Unexpected item in the checkout area”… cheeky b*stard.
Wow you’re so hot I’m gonna put you on my bucket list of things to do.
My insomnia is terrible at the moment. On the plus side only 3 more sleeps till Christmas.
My wife decided to bleach her facial hair the other day. I’m not sure the blond goatee beard makes her look any better.
If good things come to those who wait then is being put into prison really a punishment?