Best Funny Relationship Jokes

Funny short relationship jokes that pokes fun at relationships and marriage. Also includes numerous jokes about women and men.

Philosophy

in Relationship Jokes
+54 -28

The following conversation took place between a husband and wife while discussing philosophy.

Wife: What’s the meaning of life?
Husband: My dick!
Wife: Yeah that’s true, life is short.

Weight

in Relationship Jokes
+41 -15

Just had the following conversation with my wife.

Wife: Can’t believe how much weight I’ve gained since lockdown.
Me: You haven’t gained that much weight. Come on… chin up. No, the other one.

Be positive

in Relationship Jokes
+41 -15

My dad died recently. He lost a lot of blood and nobody knew his blood-type. I’ll never forget his inspirational last words, “Be positive”.

Wife Affair

in Relationship Jokes
+53 -28

Found out recently that my wife had an affair with a midget.

I can’t believe she would stoop so low.

Date

in Relationship Jokes
+51 -26

Went on a date with a girl and I told her to text me when she got home. It’s been 3 weeks now and I still haven’t got a text, I think she must be homeless.

Cafe

in Relationship Jokes
+38 -14

Following conversation took place between husband and wife in a cafe.

Husband: I love you.
Wife: Is that you talking or the wine?
Husband: I was talking to the wine.