Best Funny Relationship Jokes

Funny short relationship jokes that pokes fun at relationships and marriage. Also includes numerous jokes about women and men.

Vasectomy

in Relationship Jokes
+64 -34

Can’t believe how much doctors lie. Last year I went to hospital to get a vasectomy to stop my wife getting pregnant but it turns out all it does is change the color of the baby.

Shopping

in Relationship Jokes
+41 -13

Just had the following argument with the wife while out shopping:

Wife: Does this dress make me look fat?
Me: Do you promise not to get mad whatever I say?
Wife: Yes, sure.
Me: I f*cked your sister.

One In A Million

in Relationship Jokes
+58 -30

My wife told me today that I was one in a million. After checking through her text messages it looks like she was right.

Ethiopian Girlfriend

in Racist Jokes, Relationship Jokes
+140 -112

Q. What’s the best thing about having an Ethiopian girlfriend?
A. You know she’ll swallow.

Wife In Bed

in Relationship Jokes
+46 -19

Really satisfied my wife in bed last night. I slept on the sofa.