Q: Where is the toilet ? A: Shit on the floor
Two Irish men talking in a bar, Mick and Paddy.
“So Paddy what’s your ringtone?” says Mick “I’ve never looked Mick but I would imagine it’s a light brown colour”.
Managed to fake my first orgasm with my wife the other night. I just made a loud grunting noise and then poured warm yogurt on her ass.
Are you religious? Because you’re the answer to all my prayers.
What do you call a Chinese person who accidentally brushes his teeth with super glue?
Foo King Mong
Can’t believe how thirsty my Grandma is. Just drove past her house and she’s got about 10 pints of milk on her doorstep.