Why do new born babies never get any birthday cake?
I almost died today because of my stupid doctor. He told me I should get off the bus 1 stop early to get some exercise. I ended up walking 50 miles after catching the Megabus.
What do you call some who doesn‘t like standing in a lift with germans? Klausrtophic.
A new dangerous variant of Covid has now emerged from Thailand.
It’s been named the Phuket variant.
Can’t believe how awesome my new pet goldfish is. Just found out that if you put it on the carpet it can actually do break dancing.
Q. Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a boner?
A. I don’t have a Ferrari.