Why do most people find wars unnecessary and brutal? Because most people don‘t have shares in arms companies.
Yo mama is so dumb she tried to take her own life by jumping out of the basement window.
Have you got any farm experience because I really need milking?
I may not be able to celebrate Valentines day, but at least w*nkers like me can still celebrate palm Sunday.
Me: Do you like raisins? Girl: No. Me: Well how about a date?
Have you heard about the new Bill Gates vaccine? When you first take it you turn blue and keep going to sleep but then after a couple of years they give you an updated version and it starts working properly.