How many men does it take to open a beer bottle?
Zero. It should be open when she brings it.
Why wife loves to role-play in bed. She usually pretends to be a coma patient.
Fell asleep with my iPhone under my pillow last night and when I woke up it was gone and replaced with a shiny new fifty pence piece. Damn that Blue-Tooth Fairy.
Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? To get to your house! ….. Knock Knock Who’s there… The chicken.
#### Parachute For Sale ####
One parachute for sale. Only ever used once, never opened, has some red stains.
Yo mama is so fat every time she goes to the beach she gets surrounded by people and they try and push her back into the water.