Q. What do you call an alligator who wears a vest? A. An investigator.
I’ll never forget my granddad’s last words. “Are you holding that ladder properly?”
I decided to burn a lot of calories today… I set fire to a fat kid that lives on my street!!
Can’t believe I’ve just been banned from using Match.com. Apparently “My dick”, is an inappropriate answer to the question ‘What do you want most in a woman?”.
How do you know that Noah was white?
No black guy could go 40 days on a boat without eating chicken.
Man: You’re a bit fat aren’t you. Women: Tell me something I don’t know! Man: Salad taste’s nice.