A horse walks into a bar… The bartender says “Why the long face?”
The horse, unable to speak English, shits on the floor and leaves.
Last night a cinema near me was robbed of over £1000.
The thieves took one large bag of popcorn, two large drinks and a pack of Skittles.
I was taking a shit at 11:59 and the clock struck midnight.
I thought to myself “same shit different day”.
Q: Why are women like condoms?
A: The both spend about 90% of the time in your wallet and 10% of the time on your cock
What has four legs and says boo? A cow with a cold.
Q. How do farmers party? A. They turnip the beats.