The Best Funny Wife Jokes

Went to the hospital today to see a doctor because me and my wife have been struggling to have a baby. He told me I have a condition called ‘small cox’.

I like to make love to my wife with a mirror in the room. I usually put it under her nose to make sure she’s still breathing.

My wife and I have decided we don’t want children. If anybody does please send me your email address and we can drop them off tomorrow.

My wife asked me for an iPad the other day for her birthday. I had no idea she enjoys dressing as a pirate. Hope she likes it.

My wife left me for a weather man. She’ll be mist.

The following conversation took place between a couple while out shopping.

Woman: “Does this dress make me look fat?”
Man: “No… But your face does.”