The Best Funny Wife Jokes

Three things that can make a man depressed.

1. Job Sucks
2. Bank balance sucks
3. Wife doesn’t suck

What’s the difference between a wife and a job? A job still sucks after 10 years.

Just told my wife I’ve been seeing a psychiatrist. She told me she’s been seeing a psychiatrist, a bartender and 2 plumbers.

Q. What do you do if your wife comes crawling back?

A. Drag her back into the garden and make sure you dig the hole deeper.

Q:What do you do if your wife keeps moaning at you?

A:Put the phone down and order another drink from the bar.

As soon as it gets frosty outside my wife becomes obsessed with looking through the window.

Maybe I should let her in the house.