Best Funny Relationship Jokes

Funny short relationship jokes that pokes fun at relationships and marriage. Also includes numerous jokes about women and men.

Wife Died

in Relationship Jokes
+30 -21

My wife died a few months ago. Ever since I’ve been a total mess… no sleep, weight loss, bloodshot eyes, unlaundered clothes… The other day my best friend told me “Steve, you’ve got to stop partying!”

007

in Relationship Jokes
+16 -7

My wife gave me a new nickname the other day, 007:

0 Romance
0 Hygiene
7 Meals per day

Wife

in Relationship Jokes
+16 -7

Q. What do you say to your wife during sex?
A. Nothing.. I don’t phone the wife when I’m having sex.

Drive Women Crazy with 6 Inches!

in Relationship Jokes
+24 -15

What is 6 inches long, 3 inches wide and drives women crazy? A £50 note.

Wife

in Relationship Jokes
+16 -7

A wife can help turn you into a millionaire. If you start off as a billionaire.

Tool

in Relationship Jokes
+31 -23

My friend called me a ‘tool’ so I got hammered and nailed his girlfriend. I guess he was right.