Just got a new tattoo on my dick. It says “Pull once for sex, pull 100 times for no sex”.
A blind man walks into a bar… then a table… then finally a chair.
The man who created auto-correct has dies.
Restaurant in peace.
Got stopped by a women in the street today. She said “Excuse me sir, have you had an accident in the last 3 years that wasn’t your fault? I said, “Yes, she’s nearly 3 now.”
Just bought a chinchilla. That should hopefully keep my chin nice and cool in all this heat.
What does a dwarf get if he runs through a womans legs? A clit round the ear and a flap across the face.