The best thing about having a prostitute die on you is that you get to have the 2nd hour for free
I’m an animal in bed. I like to be patted on the head and given food.
Can’t believe I wasn’t allowed to emigrate to Australia because of my criminal record. You’d think they’d be more understanding given the history.
Yo mama is so fat, if she wears a yellow shirt and goes on a trampoline people think she is the sun.
I woke up bald this morning.
I think my wife misunderstood me when I told her to shave her twat.
My friend has recently decided to take ‘Women Studies’ at college… At first I thought it was sexist that the college only offered ‘Women studies’ but then I realised that ‘Men Studies’ is actually called History.