I tried phone sex last night but the holes where too small.
Punched a doctor this morning after I misheard.
Apparently he told my wife she had ‘acute angina’.
Women love a man brimming with confidence. Because, without that, what’s left to destroy?
Just seen a man at the beach shouting “Help, shark! Help!”. What an idiot, how can a shark help a human?
What do you call a Pakistani joiner? A-med-a-shed
There’s only 3 things I hate about my job. 1. Waking up. 2. The people 3. Working