Best Funny General Jokes

If a gay guy goes into a coma does that make him a vegetable or a fruit?

Went to a party last night at MC Hammer’s house. It was terrible, he kept getting really paranoid about people touching things.

Just found a dead Native American and a load of buffalo skins in my kitchen. That’s the last time I hire cowboy builders.

You know you’ve had a good sh*t at work when you come back and your screensaver is on.

Went to McDonalds yesterday and the cashier had a black eye.
I made sure I spoke loud and clear when ordering because she obviously had trouble listening.

Just started my first day as an aquatic vegan. I now only eat fruits, nuts, plants, and animals that live in water like fish, crabs, ducks and baby seals.