Best Funny General Jokes

Just paid $1000 for an iPhone 7. Airplane mode better take me to Miami.

Just had the following conversation at a job interview

Interviewer: What’s your main weakness and strength?
Me: Well my main weakness is knowing the difference between truth and fiction.
Interviewer: And your strength?
Me: My main strength is that I’m Batman!

Just got some happy news. My parents recently got food poisoning from a restaurant and I’ve finally managed to get a refund for them. That should help towards the funeral expenses.

I used to really hate my beard but then it grew on me.

My friend Gav died from heartburn this morning.

I can’t believe Gaviscon.

2 women sitting at a table quietly.