Best Funny General Jokes

I don’t understand why banks get so upset when you can’t repay a loan.

They already knew I had no money when I came to borrow the money.

Can’t believe how desperate my maths teacher is, he keeps asking me to find his x. I think it’s time he faced the truth, she’s not coming back.

The following conversation took place at bar

Customer: What’s the WiFi password?
Barman: You need to buy a drink first.
Customer: Ok, I’ll have a coke.
Barman: $10 please.
Customer: There you go. So what’s the wifi password?
Barman: You need to buy a drink first. No spaces, all lowercase!

The following conversation took place today at the hospital after the doctor told me I’ve only got 3 weeks to live.

Me: Is there nothing you can give me to help?
Doctor: Try drinking 1 litre of olive oil every day
Me: Will that cure me?
Doctor: No but it will make your cremation a lot quicker.

Interviewer: Your resume says you’re very quick at maths.
Me: Yes I am!
Interviewer: Whats 12 x 37?
Me: 49.
Interviewer: That’s not even close!
Me: Yeah, but it was fast.