Best Funny Dirty Jokes

A term made up by women no one will fuck.

What is the difference between a job and a dead prostitute?
A job still sucks.

Just had the following conversation with my wife.

Wife: Why is the laptop sticky?
Me: It’s not what you think, it’s ice cream.
Wife: How did you manage to get ice cream all over the laptop?
Me: Have you ever tried eating ice-cream and masterbating at the same time?

What do you call a prostitute with a fake tan?

An Orange pay as you go!

All woman are bi. It’s a man’s job figure out if they are bi-sexual or bi polar.

Went to a party last night dressed as a chicken and I met a girl dressed as an egg.

Answered a very old philosophical question… it was the chicken that came first.