Best Funny Animal Jokes

Contains funny animal jokes and dirty one liners that will have you in stitches.

Birds

in Animal Jokes
+5 -29

Two birds were sitting on a tree and one looked at the other and said, ‘Dam today really FLEW by’.

Cat Flap

in Animal Jokes
+24 -49

Q. How do you make a cat flap?
A. Throw it off a cliff.

Hit Dog

in Animal Jokes
+12 -37

Just hit a dog with my car on the way home from work. It’s OK though, I stopped the car, picked up the dog and put a suicide note under its paw.

Dog In Korea

in Animal Jokes
+17 -43

Q. What is the most popular name for a dog in Korea?
A. Starter

Pets

in Animal Jokes
+6 -35

PETS (People for the Ethical Treatment of Salad)

[throws salad into a garden]
Go home…you’re free now.

Sick Dog

in Animal Jokes, Racist Jokes
+46 -76

Got my sick dog put down earlier today. I was worried it was gonna be expensive but they actually did it for free and they gave me a bag of prawn crackers with 3 spring rolls.