Hi I’m doing a survey, can i have your name and phone number?
Hi, I was just wondering if you have low standards?
Really hate my nine to five job. Starting work at 4:51 is ridiculous
What do you call someone who sleeps with old people? An OAP-daphile.
Just had a message from that girlfriend that she’s had a beautiful little girl weighing 7lbs 3oz. Coincidentally that’s the same size as my c*ck.
Hi, I overheard you talking with your friend and I’d just like to say that you’re really boring the shit out of me. Every word you speak is like a pillow over my face.