Are you a doctor?? cause you just cured my erectile dysfunction.
Do you like blackberries or strawberries because I want to know what type of pancakes to order you in the morning.
Why is Christmas just like your job?
Because after you do all the work the fat guy in the suit gets all the credit.
What does a pregnant women and a locked car have in common?
You can fix both with a coat-hanger.
Did you hear about the 3 zoo employees who were injured recently? They got attacked by a chimpanzee that set fire to it’s own feces using a discarded cigarette. Apparently they were rushed to the hospital with TURD degree burns.
Yo mama is so stupid she made love to a carrot the other night because she was fed up of wearing glasses and wanted her eyesight to improve.