I was at the doctor’s the other day having a prostate exam when he said, “Oh my God!”
“What is it, Doctor?” I asked, mildly shitting myself.
“You’ve mildly shat yourself,” he replied.
Q. Why did god give women legs? A. So they could walk from the kitchen to the bedroom.
What did the guy at the beach say to the pedo?
Excuse me but could you please get out of my son!
Why do Jews put double glazing on their houses? So their kids can’t hear the ice-cream man.
Yo mama is so fat when she uses a lift, the lift can only go downwards.
If you have a parrot and you don’t teach it to say,”Help, I’ve been turned into a parrot!”, you’re wasting everyone’s time.