Man: Your place or mine? Women: Both, you go to yours and I’ll go to mine.
Yo mama so stupid, she thought taco bell was a Mexican phone company
Psychic wanted: $200,000 per year offered including company car. Please email your CV to the address which appears in your crystal ball.
My next door neighbours just got arrested after recent police raids against online paedophiles. Not sure where I’m going to get my free wi-fi now.
Facebook should have a limit on the number of times people can change their relationship status.
After five, it ought to default to “Unstable”
3 reasons why my wife is like a freezer.
1. She never stops making a noise. 2. She can hold a lot of food inside her. 3. It can take hours of “defrosting” to make her wet.