Q. Why did the worker on the egg farm get fired from his job?
A. Because he had a crack addiction.
What’s the difference between a woman and a terrorist?? You can negotiate with a terrorist.
If God made everything then does that mean he’s Chinese?
I went to my doctor and he said he had some good news and some bad news. He said the good news was that he got my test results and I had two days to live. Then he said the bad news was that he has been trying to contact me for two days.
Heard on the radio today that someone in the world crashes their car every 30 seconds. Maybe they should take away his licence.
Bad things to write in a birthday card.
“Life is pain, misery, suffering and a slow march to death. Happy 5th birthday Katie.”