The Best Funny Wife Jokes

When me and my wife have arguments I always have the last word. Usually those words are ‘Sorry, you’re right’.

Last night my wife asked me to make her feel special so I gave her a coloring book and some crayons.

Got my wife a pair of slippers and a vibrator for her birthday.
If she doesn’t like the slippers she can go f*ck herself.

When you get married you get 3 rings.

1. Engagement Ring
2. Wedding Ring
3. SuffeRING!!

I tried to log on to my computer this morning but it wouldn’t let me in.
I shouted to my wife, “Babe, have you changed the password on the PC?”
“Yes honey.”
“What is it?”
“It’s the date of our anniversary.”
Bitch.

My wife said I was rude for yawning when she was shouting at me.

I told her I wasn’t yawning, I was just trying to speak.