The Best Funny Wife Jokes

Why did my wife cross the road? To get back to the first shoe shop we went in three f*cking hours ago.

Spoke to my son yesterday to teach him about the birds and the bees. He ended up teaching me about my wife and the milkman.

Last night my wife told me she doesn’t like giving bl*wjobs because her jaw starts to hurt. Seems to work fine when she talks for hours on end.

I think I might be the most unlucky person in the world. Last night my wife told me she wants to have sex on the back seat of her car, she was wondering if I could drive.

Me and my wife have an on-off relationship. Every time I get on she tells me to get off.

Last night my wife allowed me to go on top.
I love bunk beds!!