Best Funny Dirty Jokes

The best top rated funny short dirty jokes of all time. Hilariously rude humor that looks at the funny side of sex.

Free

in Dirty Jokes
+18 -24

People say the best things in life are free but those people have clearly never had sex.

PE Meeting

in Dirty Jokes
+18 -25

Went to a premature egaculation meeting today but nobody was there. It turns out the meeting is actually tomorrow.

Hunters

in Dirty Jokes
+25 -32

Q. Why do hunters make the best lovers?

A. They go deep in the bush, they shoot more than once and they always eat what they shoot.

Three Steps

in Dirty Jokes
+25 -32

Three steps to safely remove a woman’s bra.

1. Cut straps with scissors, be careful as scissors can be sharp.
2. Never make comments about her nipples being weird.
3. If you’re in a supermarket make sure she isn’t carrying any glass bottles.

Man Women Torch

in Dirty Jokes
+23 -30

A man and a woman begin having sex in the middle of a field. After about 10 minutes, the man gets up and says, “Damn, I wish I had a torch!”. The woman says, “Me too, you’ve been eating grass for the past ten minutes!”

Drink

in Dirty Jokes
+18 -25

The following conversation took place between a 10 yr old boy and his dad.

Boy: I’ve had sex with my teacher today!
Dad: Way to go son, I’m gonna get you that bike you wanted!
Boy: No thanks dad, after all that sex the saddle will really hurt my ass.