Best Funny Animal Jokes

Contains funny animal jokes and dirty one liners that will have you in stitches.

Thief

in Animal Jokes
+150 -47

Last night a thief broke into my house and started looking for money so i woke up and joined him.

Duck Fart

in Animal Jokes
+147 -64

Q. How does a duck fart?

A. Through his arsequack.

Dolphin Tattoo

in Animal Jokes, Dirty Jokes
+192 -109

My girlfriend just recently got a tattoo of a dolphin on her inner thigh. It’s amazing what tattooists can do these day, when you put your face near it you can actually smell the ocean.

Voice In Head

in Animal Jokes, Dirty Jokes
+155 -72

As she lay there in my bed next to me I thought to myself “relax, you’re not the first doctor to sleep with a patient” but the other voice in my head said “But Howard you are a vet”.

Bear teeth

in Animal Jokes
+117 -54

What do you call a bear with no teeth, a gummy bear!

Wedding Video

in Animal Jokes
+86 -24

Just watched my wedding video backwards. I love the part where she takes off the ring, walks back down the isle and drives away