Best Funny Animal Jokes

I’m really worried about my parrot. He keeps saying, “I can’t go on, I hate my life”. My roommate’s too selfish to notice. He’s always crying.

Our new puppy’s been rolling around in its own shit.

That’s what I’m telling the wife anyway. Easier to explain than the fact that I ran out of toilet paper.

How do you know when a crab is drunk? It walks forwards.

If two vegans have an argument is it still called a beef… or is it a quornfrontation?

Three strangest animals known to man.
1. The urine loving Candiru fish.
2. The exploding termites of French Guiana.
3. White person with dreadlocks.

My psychiatrist said that I have the memory of an elephant.

I keep thinking about elephants.