Got an email from a bored housewife the other day looking for ‘some action’ so I decided to send her some of my ironing to keep her busy.
How to avoid stress at work.
1. Don’t go to work.
Saw a man earlier today at the beach shouting “Help, shark! Help!”. It made me laugh, there’s no way he was ever gonna convince a shark to help him.
Make sure you wear protection when your having phone sex.
I had phone sex the other night without protection and now I have hearing aids.
My dad died recently. He lost a lot of blood and nobody knew his blood-type. I’ll never forget his inspirational last words, “Be positive”.
Guy: Hi do you care about the environment? Girl: Yes. Guy: Well maybe we can take showers together to save water.