Best Short Jokes All Time

Collection of the all time best funny short jokes sorted by user rating.

Nov

Overheard Pickup Line

By Ronb

in Pick Up Lines

+15 -40

Hi, I overheard you talking with your friend and I’d just like to say that you’re really boring the shit out of me. Every word you speak is like a pillow over my face.

Mar

Money

By Dave

in Dirty Jokes

+20 -45

I came into a lot of money last week which is unusual for me… I normally uses tissues.

Apr

Seven Seconds

By Vush3

in Dirty Jokes

+13 -39

Apparently men think about sex every seven seconds. Luckily I wrote this in sex.

Nov

Hit Dog

By Fred

in Animal Jokes

Tags: Dog Jokes

+16 -42

Just hit a dog with my car on the way home from work. It’s OK though, I stopped the car, picked up the dog and put a suicide note under its paw.

Mar

Yesterday

By Dave

in General Jokes

+10 -36

Yesterday I had to change a lightbulb. Today I had a drink in a bar with a Jew and an Irish man.

Looks like my life has become one big joke.

Dec

Compassion

By MiguelA

in General Jokes

+12 -38

Why are some diseases more acceptable than others? When you have cancer you get compassion and sympathy but when you’re an alcoholic you get shouted at and told thrown out of the ladies toilets at McDonalds.