You gotta hand it to short people….
Mainly because they can’t reach.
Two interesting facts about me.
1) My testicles are the same size as 2 Chicken McNuggets.
2) I’m banned from McDonalds.
Tomorrow, I’m going to open up the time capsule I made 20 years ago when I was a kid. I can’t wait to see how big my puppy is.
Just invented a vaccine that can save 3 million Africans per year.
It’s called FOOD.
Just had the following conversation with my wife.
Wife: Can’t believe how much weight I’ve gained since lockdown.
Me: You haven’t gained that much weight. Come on… chin up. No, the other one.
1. Pour a glass of wine
2. If you can smell it you don’t have Covid
3. If you can taste it you don’t have Covid
Repeat 15 times just be to sure.