Got a rubbish thesaurus for my birthday the other day. It was rubbish.
I went to a French restaurant last night and was served by a hideously ugly waitress. She really gave me the crepes.
Went to the gym last night and lost 4 stones in one day.
I accidentally ripped my leg off on the squat machine.
Five signs that a women is angry with you.
1. She’s silent. 2. She’s yelling. 3. She acts the same. 4. She acts different. 5. She murdered you.
Hi I’m doing a survey, can i have your name and phone number?
The following conversation took place at a dentists.
Dentist: Say Ahhh!! Patient: Why? Dentist: My cat died earlier this morning.