What’s green and melts in your mouth? A leper’s c*ck.
Q. How can you tell that God is a man? A. Because if he was a woman men would shit diamonds and sperm would taste like chocolate.
Yo mama is so stupid that when I told her Windows had no virus protection she called a builder.
Fuel prices going up don’t effect me. When I fill up I only ever put £20 in.
Iron Man is a superhero.
Iron Woman is a command.
My wife recently told me she wanted to go around the world so for her birthday I decided to buy her an atlas.