Best Short Jokes All Time

Collection of the all time best funny short jokes sorted by user rating.

Sep

Press Ups

By Tim

in General Jokes

+14 -31

This week I managed to do 14 press ups. I did two press-ups every day for 7 days.

Jun

Genetic Defect

By SarahW

in Political Jokes

+14 -31

Just found out that due to a genetic defect I can’t drive and I have a lack of spatial awareness. I also can’t think logically and I get terrible mood swings.

On the plus side I can have kids, I’m great in the kitchen and I’ve got a cracking set of tits.

Nov

TV Show

By MarkA

in Surreal Jokes

+14 -31

What if life is a reality tv show created by aliens and the winner is the person who gets the most guests to go to their funeral.

Dec

Bird

By Das21

in Dirty Jokes

+12 -29

I found out some cunt shagged my bird last night. This morning, there was jizz dribbling out of my turkey.

Jan

Green and Melts

By Squiddy

in Dirty Jokes, Disabled Jokes

+20 -37

What’s green and melts in your mouth?
A leper’s c*ck.

Mar

God

By Louise

in Dirty Jokes, Religious Jokes

+45 -62

Q. How can you tell that God is a man?
A. Because if he was a woman men would shit diamonds and sperm would taste like chocolate.