Best Short Jokes All Time

Collection of the all time best funny short jokes sorted by user rating.

Psychic

in Dirty Jokes
+33 -42

The best thing about fingering a psychic on her period is that you still get your palm read.

Bank

in General Jokes
+15 -24

Just went to the bank to pay some bills and they made me prove my identity. What’s the point in that? Is it common for strangers to pay bills and if so why is the bank stopping them?

Drink Milk

in Animal Jokes
+24 -33

Why is it that if you drink milk from a cow society thinks that’s normal but if you drink milk from another human you get arrested by security guards?

First Fight

in Relationship Jokes
+39 -48

After 3 years of marriage, me and the wife had our first real fight last night.
I called my dad for advice on how to fix things.
He told me to apologize and admit I was wrong.
I was really looking for advice on how to dispose of the body.

McDonalds

in Surreal Jokes
+18 -27

An elephant, an ostrich and a crocodile walk into McDonalds and interrupt a half-naked man eating a burger. The crocodile pulls out a police badge and says, “We have reason to believe you are carrying substances of a hallucinogenic nature, Sir.”

Hospital

in Relationship Jokes
+15 -24

My wife just came back from the hospital the other day and the doctors told her she had Covid19.

I was devastated. I had a brilliant cancer joke lined up.