Best Funny General Jokes

Q. What do orphans get at Christmas?
A. Lonely.

May Yammow finds it difficult to introduce herself when holidaying in Spain.

A lady at work today was complaining because she said the escalator was broken. I told her “escalators never break, they just become stairs”.

Top 3 phrases that men dread to hear.

1. Sorry the bacon has run out.
2. Sorry the beer has run out.
3. Is it in yet?

Three fun things you can do without money.

1. When you sign for a package at the post office put a peenis as your signature.
2. Walk up to a small child who looks like you and say you are them from the future.
3. Call a restaurant that sells chicken and ask them to talk about their breasts and how big and juicy they are.

I used to love posh spice when I was younger. My parents ended up spending a fortune every week on saffron.