Best Funny General Jokes

Collection of general hilarious funny short jokes that are guaranteed to make you laugh.

Lemons

in General Jokes
+51 -51

When life throws you lemons, make lemonade… But also remember that unless you add water and sugar your lemonade will taste like shit.

Potato Chips

in General Jokes
+9 -9

My doctor is such an idiot. He recently told me I need to loose weight and recommended I start eating apples instead of potato chips, I’m pretty sure apples weigh more.

Fear

in General Jokes
+15 -15

Just been diagnosed with chronic fear of giants… or Feefiphobia as my doctor calls it.

Offends

in General Jokes
+21 -21

If one of my jokes offends you

1. I’m sorry
2. It won’t happen again.
3. 1 and 2 are lies.
4. You’re a pussy.

Humble

in General Jokes
+26 -26

When I die, I’d like the word ‘Humble’ to be written in diamonds on my 20ft statue made from solid gold.

Drinking

in General Jokes
+24 -24

After this weekend I’ve decided to give up drinking for good.
I now only drink for evil.