Best Funny General Jokes

Worst thing to say in a job interview:

“Does your company block porno websites and how long do I get for toilet breaks? “

Q: What has three balls and comes from outer space?
A: E.T. the extra testicle.

I gave my liver a big surprise today, I actually drank a glass of water.

Have you heard about that new TV program about origami?
It’s paper view.

Can’t believe how much of a sarcasm expert I’ve become recently. People are actually starting to think I’m really polite.

The five stages of life:

1. Birth.
2. Pissing and shiting yourself.
3. Having to pay for everything.
4. Pissing and shiting yourself.
5. Death.