Got in trouble last night after I went on a date but didn’t open the car door for the lady I was with. To my shame I decided to just swim to the surface and save myself.
When me and my wife have arguments I always have the last word. Usually those words are ‘Sorry, you’re right’.
Jesus is the best. I bet if Aquaman and Jesus had a fight, Jesus would walk all over him.
I never have any luck with women. The other day my girlfriend won a trip for 2 to Las Vegas, she went there twice on her own.
Last night my wife asked me to make her feel special so I gave her a coloring book and some crayons.
Did you know that 85% of pie charts resemble Pacman?