If women could read minds men would get slapped every 2 seconds.
Q. What do you call a black hitch-hiker? A. Stranded.
Last night my girlfriend dressed up as a policewoman and told me I was under arrest on suspicion of being good in bed…
2 minutes later she told me all the charges were dropped due to lack of evidence.
The other day my Nan found a lump in each of her breasts. Turns out it was just her knees.
Iraqi Awards Night:
And the 2016 winner for suicide bomber of the year goes to… Abdul Sahib. Unfortunately he couldn’t be here with us tonight.
Chocolate comes from cocoa, which comes from a tree, which is a plant. Therefore chocolate is a type of salad. The End.