The following conversation took place in a library.
Customer: Hi, I’m looking for the new book by Dr Schultz about small penises.
Librarian: Sorry, I don’t think it’s in yet.
Customer: Yes, that’s the one!!
Yesterday I asked my wife what she wanted for her upcoming birthday and she told me she wants something with a lot of diamonds. I hope she likes the pack of playing cards I got her.
Can’t believe how ungrateful my dwarf next door neighbor is. I saw him waiting at the bus stop earlier today and offered to give him a lift but he told me to “f*ck off”. In the end I decided to just close my rucksack and walk away.