Best Short Jokes All Time

Collection of the all time best funny short jokes sorted by user rating.

Threesome

in Dirty Jokes
+55 -14

I had a threesome last night.

Two people didn’t show up though, so I had to take matters into my own hands.

Weighing Scale

in General Jokes
+86 -45

Stepped on my weighing scale this morning and it said:

“Please use social distancing, one person at a time”.

Time Capsule

in Animal Jokes
+58 -17

Tomorrow, I’m going to open up the time capsule I made 20 years ago when I was a kid. I can’t wait to see how big my puppy is.

iPhone

in Political Jokes, Racist Jokes
+143 -103

Think there’s a problem with my iPhone. The battery dies quicker than a black guy in the back of a police van.

Three Kings

in General Jokes
+73 -33

Teacher: Name three Kings of England who greatly transformed the country and made it a better place to live.

Student: Drin-king, smo-king and fu-king.

Inappropriate Massage

in Dirty Jokes
+80 -40

This chick tried to get me fired today for giving her an inappropriate massage in the office. I said “Good luck with that sweetheart, I don’t even work here!”