Can’t believe how great the Chinese have become at making high-tech devices like mobile phones. They can do it with their eyes closed.
Are you Google? … Because you’ve got everything I’m searching for.
Yo mama is so ugly even a boiling kettle won’t whistle at her.
Q. How do you make a pool table laugh? A. Reach into its pockets and tickle its balls.
My wife used to be afraid of the dark until she saw me nayked, now she’s afraid of the light.
I don’t always get asked out on dates but when I do it’s always April 1st.